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First things first, for anyone traveling to Pittsburgh for this Sunday night’s game, please bring the following three things; a bowling ball, a case of beer and a Chris Henry jersey (trust me, it will all make sense when you get there), actually, if you own a Chris Henry jersey, just bring it everywhere you go, because nothing says “I like to have a good time” like a Chris Henry jersey.
And for those of you lucky enough to have the NFL network, I think you’ll agree that Bryant Gumbel talking is almost as scary as your doctor telling you your HIV positive. Thank god for Cris Collinsworth. That being said, lets get to this weeks rankings… NFC 1. and 2. Dallas Cowboys and Green Bay Packers- I lump these two teams together because they will be partaking in a Thursday night epic that may decide the fate of the free world, or at least the NFC. At the end of this game, we’ll know if Tony Romo is a young Brett Favre or if Favre is an old Tony Romo. We have two of the top three offenses in the NFL (not NFC, NFL) and two of the top twelve defenses going head to head. This is going to be fun, if you don’t have the NFL network, find a neighbor that does and take them hostage, trust me, this game will be worth the jail time. I’ll take the Cowboys, only because they’re at home, 31-27.
3. Tampa Bay Buccaneers- Two things never seem to amaze me, string theory and Jeff Garcia. The Bucs travel to New Orleans this week and it’s the Saints last chance to get back in the NFC South race. Desperate times call for desperate measures, the Saints will pull out all the stops this Sunday and take it 24-21. 4. Seattle Seahawks- Nothing bothers me more then when a team struggles against the Rams. On the flip side, nothing impresses me more then a three point loss to the Patriots. So because of that reasoning and the fact that Brian Westbrook is in the next step in evolution, I am going to take the Eagles 21-18. 5. New York Giants- If the Giants can somehow go 3-2 to finish the season, they’ll most likely find themselves in the playoffs. Did I say 3-2, I meant 3-1, I am going to go ahead and chalk up that game with New England as a loss. The playoff push starts this week in Chicago, Tom Coughlin is not stupid enough to let Devin Hester win this game for the Bears (or is he), I’ll take New York 27-21. 6. Minnesota Vikings- Sure the Lions are a game ahead of the Vikings, but if you saw the Lions schedule, you would write them off to. Then there is the matter of the four other 5-6 teams in the NFC, well the Vikings play two of them plus the Lions. I’m giving Minnesota the playoff berth and the win this week over the Lions 28-24. AFC 1. New England Patriots- Another week, another New England prime time game, seriously, does anyone want to see Tom Brady this much, who made the schedule, a bunch of Victoria’s Secret models? Godspeed to the Ravens this week, who I think will put up a game defensively, 27-13 Patriots. 2. Indianapolis Colts- The last couple weeks, Peyton Manning has been playing like he has been watching Trent Dilfer instructional videos. Peyton needs to get out of this funk and he needs to do it soon because the division championship starved Jaguars are coming to town. However, the game is in Indy, so I’ll take the.... 3. Pittsburgh Steelers- They played in monsoon on Monday, what does that mean, you’ll have to read on to find out. 4. San Diego Chargers- The Super Chargers head to K.C. this week and I don’t know what is more pathetic, the Chargers road record or the Chiefs home record (the answer is the Chargers road record in case you are wondering). I don’t why my cell phone works and I don’t know why I am going to pick the Chiefs, I mean they are on a four game losing streak, but it’s the AFC West, Chiefs 24-20 over the Chargers. 5. Jacksonville Jaguars- If the Jags were in almost any other division they would probably dominate, but sadly for Jacksonville fans, they are not, they’re stuck with the Colts, who I am picking to win 20-17. 6. Cleveland Browns- Bengal fans, this is the team we need to keep our eye on. They have control of the last playoff spot in the AFC and we can’t let them get above nine wins. They travel across the country this week to Arizona, I don’t have time to explain my time zone crossing, Kurt Warner, AFC North theory, but lets just say I am picking the Cardinals out of spite, 31-30. The Rest of the Best… Bills at Redskins- If there ever was a week to cheer for someone besides the Bengals, this is it, I hope the Skins can win one for Sean Taylor, because if their heads are elsewhere, they may get ran off the field. However, I’ll take Washington 20-14. 49ers at Panthers- Christmas shopping with your grandma at an underwear store would be more fun then this game, I’ll take Carolina 20-10. Texans at Titans- The Titans season has imploded, I just add salt to the wound by picking the Texans 24-23. Falcons at Rams- I would say that the Rams have dome field advantage, but the dirty birds play in a dome to, hold on, I am going to flip a coin… HEADS, Rams 27-20. Jets at Dolphins- I hate to cheer for a winless team to lose, but I want to be there when history is made and the Dolphins go 0-16, this means Jets 13-10. Broncos at Raiders- The Broncos could find themselves in first with a win and San Diego loss, usually I would say that is to much pressure for them, but not this time, Broncos 30-20 over the silver and black. BENGALS at STEELERS- Remember New Year’s Eve when the NFL decided to strip our Sunday night game away like three hours before kickoff (or so it seemed), well I do. The Steelers offense looked inept against the Dolphins, but I won’t hold that against them since they were playing in the middle of Hurricane Heinz. On the other hand the Bengals offense lit up Tennessee enough to supply the city of Cincinnati with electricity for a week. The number one ranked defense vs the fifth ranked offense, I know defense wins championships, good thing this isn’t a championship…Bengals in a 27-24 thriller, see you in Pittsburgh Bengal nation. Last Week: 13-3 (That’s right, 25-7 in two weeks, call your bookie)
Season: 94-48 Growlzone.com Cincinnati Bengals News |
